Most of the time, you’re not going to have a neatly organized book of evidence to refer to in court if you’re going through a child custody battle with your ex. It’s not uncommon to hear accounts of parents having to gather evidence in their favor because the other parent is deliberately making them look bad or embellishing the situation, for the judge, in order to get the custody arrangement that they want. In order for the journal strategy to work, you need to have already started keeping track of things early in the game. This has a few negative connotations about what your working relationship with your ex is like or judgments of people’s character but if you suspect that you will be, or currently are, a target for false accusations of negligent parenting then you need to have lists and records of how the events actually took place.
- However you have to do it. It doesn’t really matter how you keep track of this information. Obviously you don’t want to bring pockets full of napkins with notes on them or notes scribbled on the back of an envelope to the court room but just have something to present on your behalf if you’re up against false allegations from your ex. A good thing to do would be to keep a small book with blank pages in your back pocket or glove compartment in your car. If you think you ex is going to say that you never arrive on time or take the child to a bar instead of the museum, it would help to have an entry in your book from that day about when you picked them up and what you guys did. It’s all hearsay until there’s written proof.
- Lies and Slander. The records you keep should not be about bad mouthing your ex. It’s easy to start name calling in child custody battles. Your notes should reflect the truth of things. If your journal is filled with entries about how poorly dressed your ex’s new boyfriend or girlfriend is, this hardly says anything about how your kids were treated or how you acted during specific situations. The judge wants to make a decisions based on the facts, and that is exactly what you need to have written down.
For some people, this is an easy task to add to your routine or maybe you already do it in your everyday life. People who make lists of the things they need to do throughout the day and take notes regularly about different events or thoughts in their lives are actually more likely to do better in court to get custody of their child. It makes you look good if you have organized records; doubly so if the person bad mouthing you in front of the judge lacks in the notes/records department. Being organized in general will do a lot of good in itself. You be able to keep track of daily events, track you or your child’s diet to make sure both of you are eating right, or simply writing down an important thought if it comes to mind; these kinds of things are landmarks in your waking life.
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- How Does A Judge Make Decisions with Child Custody Cases? (aboutthechildrenblog.com)
- Dealing With Professional Biased Opinions in Child Custody Battles (aboutthechildrenblog.com)
- Child Custody – More on How To Win in Custody Court (aboutthechildrenblog.com)