A Simple Way To Parent Your Children Well

Don’t Put Too Much Pressure On Your Kids

                As a parent you’re job is to teach your kids how to be good people, how to be part of our society, make sure they can read and write etc.; our children, hopefully, then go on to be better versions of ourselves. If you’re a parent going through divorce and custody issues, making sure your child’s well being is upheld is a primary concern due to the stress involved in court cases and the nature of family law. Maintaining your relationship with them can be difficult throughout the process if too much weight is put on their shoulders during your separation or divorce. Most of the time you can learn a lot from how your kids are acting towards you or their mother or father. There are many things you can do in your position but being aware of how your kids feel about the whole thing is really important. The real question is, how do you take some of this pressure off of your kids during your custody dispute?

  • Our Kids Mimic Their Surroundings. What they see, i.e. you, influences them in ways that echo on into the rest of their lives. If they see you upset, getting angry, speaking less than highly of their mother or father etc., this is what they’re taking in and processing in their minds. There is a strong correlation between children observing adult aggressive behavior and how aggressive they are as people later on. One thing you can do is not let your own emotions get the better of you in a way that interferes with how you act around and treat your child. Even a small pebble makes a ripple in their pond.
  •  What To Look For. Children are open books. If you read between the lines the things that are bugging them or causing them stress will be very evident. The easiest way to make sure your child is processing the situation in a good way is to observe how they act. If you’re going to court and signing documents and going through mediation, and they start to get bad grades, get in fights at school, don’t eat their favorite foods and so on, you need to do something and talk to them. Communication is your best tool here. They need to know how you feel about splitting up with their other parent and what’s going on to come to terms with the change taking place in their life.

Making sure they don’t feel alienated, that they know they can talk to you and most of all that everything is going to be okay should be part of your mantra here. They look up to you to hold the world up around them so it doesn’t all come crashing down on them. Your actions and how you handle your court case for divorce, custody or visitation have a huge impact on everyone involved. If you’re busy having a legal dispute with your ex, just make your primary goal to not be too busy to talk to your kids.

Read more at www.AboutTheChildren.org

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Posted in A Childs Best Interests, Child Custody, child custody battles, Child Visitation, Parenting Tips, Raising Children

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